Slow Brain Day

Every once in a while it’s practically essential, nigh on prerequisite to the role of a human, to entirely screw the pooch; mess, goof, and all-round fuck it right up.

I’m not sure why I’ve developed such a fantastic, uncanny fortĂ© at sticking my thumb firmly up my arsecrack like a Neanderthal hiding from a bloody big dinosaur only to be eaten by hungry dwellers of the cave in which he decided to hide, but there you go!

Sometimes it’s the little things, which does somewhat suck balls, but then you have the painful gobstoppers—last I checked, my jaw isn’t made out of steel.

If my brain is fed enough information too quickly, particularly of an emotional nature, it defiantly exclaims “nope!” My brain is quite simply having none of it. This happened tonight and I’m having a jolly brilliant go at myself for it, as per my usual neurotic self. Is it my fault? Nah, I’m only human, but I’m still bathing in self-loathing.

Tonight’s latency has most likely resulted in someone having a pretty bum night, because the little neurons decided to take a sick day. Fuck you, neurons; I’m docking your pay.

It’s funny how you can inadvertently hurt someone while simultaneously caring about them a great deal. Tell a lie, there’s nothing funny about it, it’s just one of those stupid life things we all have to stumble across. Parents do it, friends do it, and even married couples do it. It’s all the rage.

Sometimes you can’t help yourself; you’re just swept away by the current and if you’re perfectly honest with yourself, you don’t care if it leads to a pit of molten lava.

At the end of the day, the water’s warm, there’s fish tickling your feet, and you’re generally having quite a blast.

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